Self-care is a popular term these days, and I’ve heard some Christians turn their noses up at the idea. If you do an online search for the phrase, you’ll find well known Bible teachers speaking out against it, and other well-meaning Christians saying it’s fine. I understand the controversy. As believers, we’re taught to not focus on self, and what is self-care if not focusing on yourself, right?

To be honest, I think this might be a classic case of throwing out the baby with the bathwater (such a strange term). In our effort to not be self-focused, many of us have completely forgotten ourselves, which can leave us unable to be much help to anyone.

As Christian women, we’ve bought into the lie that tells us (in not so many words) that in order to put others first, we must throw ourselves in the dumpster. Our friends at the airlines were aware of the true benefit of self-care decades ago when they told us to put our masks on first before trying to assist others with their masks. It makes sense when you think about it that way. But for some reason, self-care still remains a touchy subject in certain church circles.

This is not what Christ intended. We shouldn’t be doing, doing, doing for others to the detriment of our own well-being. Even Jesus took time to practice self-care, “But he would withdraw to desolate places and pray.” (Luke 5:16) Of course, practicing self-care doesn’t mean we should adopt a me-first attitude, and blow others off either. Balance is always necessary. 

So, what does self-care look like for a Christ follower? 

I’m not a self-care expert, but as I journey through this divorce, and all the hard feelings that come with it, I’m trying harder to take care of myself. These are some self-care practices that I’ve found work for me.

First of all, my self-care starts with me spending time in the Word. (Funny side note: My word processing software suggested that I change the word “word” to “world.” No thanks, we know that’s definitely not the solution!) 

Spending time in the word is how I fuel myself for whatever might be heading my way that day. It’s my prep for a great day, a bad day, and every kind of day in between. I will admit that there was a time in my life when I could start my day without the Bible. It was on the “nice to have” not “need to have” list. I can tell you from experience that this is not a good place to be! I cherish my time with the Lord in the morning, but it doesn’t have to be the morning for you if that doesn’t fit with your life. 

After I’ve taken care of my soul, I take care of my body. Right now this looks like barre fitness workouts five days a week. Sometimes it might be walking, using the treadmill, or lifting weights. By taking care of the body that God gave me, I’m both honoring Him, and honoring myself in a good way. Did you know that when we exercise our bodies release endorphins, which improve our mood? So, on top of caring for what God gave you, you can feel better in the process. 

How else can you care for yourself without feeling selfish?

At some point during the day, I spend time doing something l love. Giving yourself the gift of doing something you love during the day can help you recharge your batteries, and be a better help to others. You might like to read, knit, garden, sing…anything you love to do will fill this need. I am an on-again off-again knitter, so sometimes you’ll find me knitting, but for the most part, I spend this time reading. Even if your life is hectic and all you can manage to do is get in 5-10 minutes of “you” time, it will be time well spent. 

Am I saying that self-care is going to solve all your problems? No. Do I pretend to assume that caring for yourself is all you need in life? Absolutely not! But I do know that when I take that time for myself, I’m in a better place emotionally, physically, and mentally to be there for others, and tackle the crazy stuff that life throws my way.

I’d love to hear about your self-care tips! Leave them in the comments below if you’d like to share!